All forums, topics and discussions are geared to single parents and the issues faced with single parenting.
Support a single parent today and one will support you back!
         


Go Back   Single Parents Forum: Single Family Voices >
(``'·.¸(``'·.¸ Single Parenting - Issues ¸.·'´´)¸.·'´´)
> Adoption

Bookmark and Share
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 01-16-2010, 02:39 AM   #1
stressedoutmommy
I am New
 
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: southern california
Posts: 2
Rep Power: 0
stressedoutmommy is an unknown quantity at this point
sorry About my situation...

I was asked about what my situation is... I am 32 years old, and my son Joshua is 4. Everything started to go wrong for me in September 2005 when I got into a car accident while I was pregnant. I think I having problems because I thought I miscarried about a month and a half after I found out I was pregnant. Then I was heavily into drugs, so I continued to party, doing speed, weed, cigarettes, alchohol, you name it. After my accident, I found out that I didn't miscarry, and I was now 4 and a half months pregnant. I spent a month in the hospital with a broken leg, and my jaw wired shut, tied to the bed, and wondering why I had a tube coming out of my neck and where I was after being in a coma for 10 days. I still don't remember the accident, and they said I was under the influence of weed, speed, and alchohol, and that I had been in a head-on collision. Once I got out of the hospital, I continued to get high because my son's father was. About a month or so later, I got arrested, and ended up going to prison for DUI with great bodily injury for 8 months. So, my son was born in prison... I had him for 2 days before my Mom came and took him home. A bunch of stuff happened after that, and I was off parole for a couple years and went back cuz I started getting high again and got caught up. I paroled again in March of 2009. Three days later, Chris, my son's father hung himself on the front door of my mom's house. Since then, I have been struggling with my sobriety and have been kicked out of my mom's trailer park cuz of my crime. We are now homeless, staying wherever we can, and I have no transportation to get anything done.
So there it is. There is so much more but that is the summary of my situation, and why I am looking for options on what to do with Josh til I can pull it together again.
stressedoutmommy is offline   Reply With Quote
Sponsored Advertisements
        
Old 01-16-2010, 08:20 AM   #2
Kozzy
Active Board Parent
 
Kozzy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 238
Rep Power: 0
Kozzy is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: About my situation...

I'm sorry for all your struggles....is there any family that can take custody of your child...or you may want to consider foster care while you go into a long term program/counseling.
I know how hard it is when you have addictions..I had some of the same issues with addiction before I had kids....eons ago....you have to make the decision to fight with everything you have to get your life straight for your kid....that's who you live for now.
__________________
Kozzy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 08:51 AM   #3
idig Female
find "fun" in dysfunction
 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 4,724
Rep Power: 131
idig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

http://www.drugandalcoholrehabchoice...ured_site.html

I came across this which lists a rehab program for single parents in AZ. Looks like you call the 800 number and they try to help you find a place that meets your needs. Maybe they would be a good place to start? Might be able to point you in the right direction.

I have to say that I admire your concern for your son's well being. Thoughts and prayers are with you. Let us know how things go.
__________________


You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into.

Last edited by idig; 01-16-2010 at 09:03 AM.
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 09:02 AM   #4
sara1
Setting New Standards
 
sara1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: pa
Posts: 1,180
Rep Power: 51
sara1 has a brilliant futuresara1 has a brilliant futuresara1 has a brilliant futuresara1 has a brilliant futuresara1 has a brilliant future
Default Re: About my situation...

Good luck and well wishes! Sounds like you have a hard road ahead of you but you can do it. I think sometimes our children give us the strength to do better things for ourselves when without them we may not have had the strength.
__________________
If you can't see the bright side of life, polish the dull.
sara1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 09:08 AM   #5
Dad1st4boys Male
Failure is not an Option.
 
Dad1st4boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Western Plains area
Posts: 2,560
Rep Power: 75
Dad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

I agree with everyone else, and I'd like to add that getting away from your old hangouts and people will help a lot. Get out of CA if you can. Get help, ask for help, if that palce cannot help. Go to the next place. Keep looking and don't stop trying.
Dad1st4boys is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 09:12 AM   #6
idig Female
find "fun" in dysfunction
 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 4,724
Rep Power: 131
idig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

http://www.marinservicesforwomen.org/programs.html
Quote:
MSW's Residential Recovery Program is organized and staffed to provide both general and specialized non-hospital-based interdisciplinary services 24 hours a day, 7 days a week for women with alcohol and drug addictions. A limited number of clients can bring a child age five and under to reside with them in the Residential Recovery Program.
Here is one for low income, they have a child development center for children 5 and under while mom goes through her program, they also have education and job training service.
__________________


You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into.
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 10:19 AM   #7
Bluemoon Female
The over-the-hill hippie
 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Mountains of Virginia
Posts: 4,948
Rep Power: 129
Bluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

Quote:
Originally Posted by idig View Post
http://www.marinservicesforwomen.org/programs.html

Here is one for low income, they have a child development center for children 5 and under while mom goes through her program, they also have education and job training service.
This looks excellent to me. Great job, Idig!
Stressedoutmommy, you absolutely must address your addiction issues as top priority or it will destroy anything else you try to do. You need help to do this.
I now understand far better why you were looking for foster care for your son, and I agree with you. If you can get into a program like the one above that would be great, but if you can't then I think talking to social services (or child protective services) about foster care would be much better than trying to continue as you are. CPS and other agencies are not in the business of breaking up families, their goal is to make families work well enough to be good for the children. They will help you if they can.
I am so sorry for the misfortune you have suffered, but you can turn all this into a postive thing if you work hard and turn it all around. It will make you stronger, wiser, and better able to help others than you would have been had you not gone through it. Good luck and God bless.
__________________
Success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles overcome while trying to succeed. --- Booker Washington
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 11:15 AM   #8
idig Female
find "fun" in dysfunction
 
idig's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2008
Location: Alabama
Posts: 4,724
Rep Power: 131
idig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond reputeidig has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

I have to add, that while agree your child should be the most important thing in your life, sobriety has to come from you and for you. I am sure you know that already. Best of wishes for you and your son.
__________________


You can't reason someone out of a position they didn't reason themselves into.
idig is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 01-16-2010, 01:05 PM   #9
LSL Female
The blunt one;)
 
LSL's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: USA
Posts: 4,334
Rep Power: 124
LSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond reputeLSL has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

Quote:
Originally Posted by idig View Post
I have to add, that while agree your child should be the most important thing in your life, sobriety has to come from you and for you. I am sure you know that already. Best of wishes for you and your son.
I agree. While you don't want state involvement, the path you are headed down right now is going to bring it right to you. In the last 2 years, I have seen parents just like you, not be able to kick the monkey on their back, and end up losing their children. It was not about loving their kids, they all did, it's about sobriety and the power the drugs can have over you.
__________________
Failure is an option, but it isn't the only one and we can't let it define us. -- trebor
LSL is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 02-13-2010, 01:14 AM   #10
Mommyofone Female
Active Board Parent
 
Mommyofone's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: USA Southeast
Posts: 288
Rep Power: 15
Mommyofone has a brilliant futureMommyofone has a brilliant futureMommyofone has a brilliant future
love Re: About my situation...

Quote:
Originally Posted by idig View Post
I have to add, that while agree your child should be the most important thing in your life, sobriety has to come from you and for you. I am sure you know that already. Best of wishes for you and your son.
I so agree with that.... i know children should come first but when it comes to addicts that unless they quit for themselves and no one else they usually didnt make it or it was so much harder. Im not saying dont have other reasons too; but main one has to be for you. Just remember your child will always love you and you always have someone to talk too! you will be in my prayers!

<3333333
Mommyofone is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-28-2010, 02:25 AM   #11
mamabear87
On the Board
 
mamabear87's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: GA
Posts: 61
Rep Power: 0
mamabear87 is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: About my situation...

Quote:
Originally Posted by Bluemoon View Post
This looks excellent to me. Great job, Idig!
Stressedoutmommy, you absolutely must address your addiction issues as top priority or it will destroy anything else you try to do. You need help to do this.
I now understand far better why you were looking for foster care for your son, and I agree with you. If you can get into a program like the one above that would be great, but if you can't then I think talking to social services (or child protective services) about foster care would be much better than trying to continue as you are. CPS and other agencies are not in the business of breaking up families, their goal is to make families work well enough to be good for the children. They will help you if they can.
I am so sorry for the misfortune you have suffered, but you can turn all this into a postive thing if you work hard and turn it all around. It will make you stronger, wiser, and better able to help others than you would have been had you not gone through it. Good luck and God bless.
I will have to agree. To turn to Social services or CPS for help in your situation will look good in their eyes in the long haul. Better to turn to them for help then for them to find you or your son in a bad situation and then take him from you. I had a friend that turned to CPS for help (she had a drug problem) with her kid and they helped her find what she needed to do for herself and her kid. She is now drug free, has a degree, has a good job, has a house, and still has her kid. It can be done. Just got to find the right source of help for you. Good luck and I hope that things look up for you.
mamabear87 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 09:45 AM   #12
JodiB Female
Board Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 33
Rep Power: 0
JodiB is an unknown quantity at this point
Default Re: About my situation...

Please message me privately, I am a Single Mom in Recovery (20 months sober.) There are a lot of gory details I am not wanting revealed in the posts. Just know that you are not ALONE!
JodiB is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 10:05 AM   #13
Bluemoon Female
The over-the-hill hippie
 
Bluemoon's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Mountains of Virginia
Posts: 4,948
Rep Power: 129
Bluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond reputeBluemoon has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

Quote:
Originally Posted by JodiB View Post
Please message me privately, I am a Single Mom in Recovery (20 months sober.) There are a lot of gory details I am not wanting revealed in the posts. Just know that you are not ALONE!
Congrats Jodi on the 20 months! WTG!!!
Bluemoon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 10:24 AM   #14
Dad1st4boys Male
Failure is not an Option.
 
Dad1st4boys's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2009
Location: Western Plains area
Posts: 2,560
Rep Power: 75
Dad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond reputeDad1st4boys has a reputation beyond repute
Default Re: About my situation...

Way to go Jodi, All we can do is one day at a time.
Dad1st4boys is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 03-01-2010, 11:16 AM   #15
YJL279 Female
Lively & Zealous Parent
 
YJL279's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: Newnan, GA
Posts: 678
Rep Power: 75
YJL279 is a glorious beacon of lightYJL279 is a glorious beacon of light
Default Re: About my situation...

Outstanding, Jodi! Try to give an update Stressedoutmommy! We care about you and want to know how you are doing!
__________________
Yvette

A strong positive mental attitude will create more miracles than any wonder drug. --Patricia Neal

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe. --Anatole France
YJL279 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Bookmark and Share
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:46 AM.

  
Web Single Parents Network
Single Family Voices A Single Parents .com

Some parent places to visit:
A Single Parents
Parent Arium
Solo Parents
Single Parent Personal Ads


Powered by vbulletin