Ex edropped bomb shell on Boys

[Dad1st4boys]

VENT ON!!!

My ex told the boys she and bf are getting married on the 15th. She told them they were just going to do it by themselves, no one there. #1 is cold and has said he does doesn't care what that woman does, she's not his mother anymore (he found some stuff on the ex's old computer, I did not ask what). #2 had a meld down, does not like the BF or what the mother has done. #3 says he's happy, #4 says he want to miss school to go to wedding.

She has not asked me or told me anything. What a short sighted, self-centered, egotistical spawn of a *&^)*^*&YJH. GRRRRRR!

I am happy that she will no longer have my last name, she has dishonored it enough. But I really hate how she puts the boys behind herself.


VENT OFF

[Bubba'sDad]

see a lawyer...what are the possible ramifications of this to you and your kids?

[Bluemoon]

Holy smokes! Ain't wastin any time, is she? I'm so sorry for your boys...

[LSL]

#4 just wants to miss school, likely, and would use any excuse.

Dad1st, I am so sorry. That was not a good thing to do to the boys right now. 1 & 2 need to process and their feelings need to be respected. They are old enough to see and know what she is doing. So, if they don't want to see her, they don't.

3 & 4 are not so old that they can't be hopeful. Poor little guys, because that means that there is more disillusionment headed their way.

My question is what has bf done that makes 1 & 2 not like him?

---------- Post added at 07:43 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:42 PM ----------

Originally Posted by Bubba'sDad

see a lawyer...what are the possible ramifications of this to you and your kids?

I honestly don't think he needs to see his lawyer. There are no ramifications at this point.

[Bubba'sDad]

Originally Posted by LSL

#4 just wants to miss school, likely, and would use any excuse.

Dad1st, I am so sorry. That was not a good thing to do to the boys right now. 1 & 2 need to process and their feelings need to be respected. They are old enough to see and know what she is doing. So, if they don't want to see her, they don't.

3 & 4 are not so old that they can't be hopeful. Poor little guys, because that means that there is more disillusionment headed their way.

My question is what has bf done that makes 1 & 2 not like him?

---------- Post added at 07:43 PM ---------- Previous post was at 07:42 PM ----------


I honestly don't think he needs to see his lawyer. There are no ramifications at this point.

i'm thinking pre-emptive in case she decides to go after custody

[momofTDR]

I'm thinkin' she doesn't give a flying rats enough to go after custody unless it was purely to be spiteful.

I'm sorry that the boys are having to go through this, Good to hear about the name change. LOL! Interesting perspective but I understand from the opposite side kind of. I changed my name quicker than quick because I didn't want anything I did to be associated with his name. heaven forbid his name have any credit given that's undue.

[LSL]

Yeah BD, I see where you are going, though she doesn't have a leg to stand on. The older two aren't gonna have anything to do with that, and their wishes would be taken into consideration. And a court is VERY unlikely to split the boys. So I think Dad is very safe here. But it never hurts to have a chat with the attorney.

[Dad1st4boys]

Originally Posted by LSL

Yeah BD, I see where you are going, though she doesn't have a leg to stand on. The older two aren't gonna have anything to do with that, and their wishes would be taken into consideration. And a court is VERY unlikely to split the boys. So I think Dad is very safe here. But it never hurts to have a chat with the attorney.

Duly noted and done already. She has to prove the the boys are worse off then when she walked out on us. Will be very hard to do. I have documents showing medical situations are better now, house is cleaner, all the boy's grades are same or even better.

I'm not a perfect Dad, But I do try with all my heart.

[Borealis]

Dad, sorry the boys are feeling hurt and that they heard the news this way. IMO the news would have been better delivered by you if possible. Then you are at hand to comfort and reassure. Yeah, to me it does seem ex is putting herself first to the point of disregarding her children feelings.

[mykidisfirst]

Dads1st- I just want to go on record to say what she is doing sucks!

[comingup4air]

Oh....that is just awful how she told the boys and you didn't even know. She just keeps dropping bombshells without regard for where they land or who they hurt. UGH!!! SO sorry that you all have to deal with this woman.

[idig]

Sorry Dad.

[TXLady]

Give it to God Dad and keep doing what you are doing. Hang in there. "This too shall Pass". It will get better.

[confused1996]

Wow just wow. She is diffently a piece of work. Poor kids. They have you dad that will make up for what she is lacking in alot of areas. HUGS

[YJL279]

She has always put herself first, the kids are so much better off with you. At least you worry about their feelings and well-being. I agree with TXLady, give it to God, although I know you already have.

[nadee_09]

Sorry Dad! What a woman to only think of herself even before the boys. Thats just not right

[Bubba'sDad]

Actually, we are all missing the other injured party in this. I think we should all send condolence cards to the new husband

[Dad1st4boys]

Originally Posted by Bubba'sDad

Actually, we are all missing the other injured party in this. I think we should all send condolence cards to the new husband

Sorry, no sympathy here, he knew she was married when they met. He should have done a background check and character references. I just hope he has lots of money, cause she'll spend it fast . When this marriage fails I do not want her coming back here as a safety zone.

[comingup4air]

Originally Posted by Dad1st4boys

When this marriage fails I do not want her coming back here as a safety zone.

If she comes back, if you don't kick her to the curb, your boys will. Some things you can't forgive.

[Dad1st4boys]

Originally Posted by comingup4air

If she comes back, if you don't kick her to the curb, your boys will. Some things you can't forgive.

The Bible says to Forgive, not forget and let it happen again.

I would consider IF.....

1, She goes to counseling for 1 year (at least 2 per week)
2. She holds a job for over 18 months
3. She stays out of debt and has a saving account with over $5000.00
4. Gives a public apology to the church in person.
5. last and not least.....if I'm not taken, because if and when I do commit in another relationship, I will be committed. (of course being committed can have more than one meaning )

[YJL279]

Dad, you are generous to even think about taking her back, but I think you should take your own advice and never let it happen again.

[LSL]

What dad is really saying is that ex would need a complete personality transplant.

[Dad1st4boys]

Originally Posted by LSL

What dad is really saying is that ex would need a complete personality transplant.

BINGO!!!! She's so narcissistic she never will see her self as the problem. I went through the stage of "Where did I go wrong" I realize I did not. I could have done better in some areas, but it would not have changed a thing.

Except the hurt she caused my boys I am very happy . She did me a big favor by showing me her true colors. Makes it easier for me to move on.

[muskiedad]

Dad I am sorry these things are set before you to deal with. Your poor boys. I just hope that she uses up this other guys money in a hurry....What a piece of work she is. And please don't ever consider taking her back.....even if she gets two personalities for the price of one on her transplant.

[Dad1st4boys]

#1 & #2 had near to fight tonight. Over nothing. I tld them both that I was disappointed in both of their actions, that they over reacted. I told them we needed to stick together and that if that are mad a me or their mother to let me know , not keep it inside and blow up at each other.
The odds of me ever taking her back is only slightly greater than me becoming Emperor of the World. There is much greater odds of me winning the Super Lotto Grand Prize $10 Billion. I won't say it's impossible, but I'll just say God Himself will have to directly intervene.

[muskiedad]

if you win the 10 billiion she will want to come back for sure!!!!!

[Dad1st4boys]

Originally Posted by muskiedad

if you win the 10 billiion she will want to come back for sure!!!!!

Good point...Note to self if big win hire bodyguards and several good lawyers. LSL need a job?

Oh, the body guards all have to be former NFL Cheerleaders.

[LSL]

Originally Posted by Dad1st4boys

Good point...Note to self if big win hire bodyguards and several good lawyers. LSL need a job?

Oh, the body guards all have to be former NFL Cheerleaders.

For the retainer fee, I would be willing to move to Kansas! Or at least be admitted to the bar in Kansas.

[muskiedad]

Now if LSL could become a cheerleader her role could be so much more meaningful here. Legal and physical protection all in one. Sounds good to me.

[sara1]

Wow Dad, she doesnt waste a minute. Just give the boys an extra hug.

[Dad1st4boys]

I just remembered the ex told the boys she was leaving on #3 son's Birthday. And now she is getting married the day after #2's Birthday.

There has to be very special Hells for Anti-Mommy's like her.

[muskiedad]

Dad, don't you know by now that she is the centre of the universe? How dare you try to rain on her parade by pointing out some things she does may be questionable! What's with this idea of making the kids feelings an issue? She needs to be happy and all you can do is stand in her way.

All sarcasm aside.......she is one weird woman. The new man will find out in due time! And by then her warranty will have expired.

[Dad1st4boys]

I bet she won't walk away without any money the next time. I almost feel sorry for the x's new victim, err..husband.

[Dad1st4boys]

Perforated Fishes!!!!

Just when I thought the ex could not be more self-center and egotistical, she drops to a new low.

I e-mailed her to ask if she wanted the boys at the wedding so I could arrange with the school. Her reply was no, they needed to be in school.

Also my #3 has had lots of stomach problem, throwing up and diarrhea over the last three months. I have been taking him to the Clinic in town. The Doc wants to do scope in his stomach. It's scheduled for Monday AM. I e-mailed X this info. Her reply was that she will be out of state and asked me to call her with the results, because she will not have access to a computer for a week.

And I was worried about her taking me to court for custody.

[comingup4air]

Originally Posted by Dad1st4boys

And I was worried about her taking me to court for custody.

Awe Dad


She's just ....something else..

[littlefoot_223]

Dad hope #3 gets better soon.

Sorry that you and the boys have to deal with her

[Bluemoon]

Oh, Dad. I'm so sorry she is being such a self centered pos.

[idig]

Oh, Dad I'm so sorry.

[Dad1st4boys]

At first I was tiffed, hurt and mad. Then i realized she is just being herself. It will be better without her at the hospital and with the boys not at the wedding. I was praying on how to handle it with her there, I think this was God's answer.

She just shot herself in the foot if she takes me to court for custody. No, both feet.

[comingup4air]

You are such a great Dad....all you care about are those boys and their wellbeing. I'm glad they won't be at the wedding either.....for THEIR sakes.

[muskiedad]

Dad that selfish decision of hers is a blessing in disguise. I hope # 3 is feeling better soon. As for calling her.....I'd only text not do the "voice" thing. Make it brief and let her seek details.

[Dad1st4boys]

I just remembered how the ex used to rail against her own father for walking out on his families (married at least 3 times that we know of.) Now she's doing the exact same thing.
Very sad, I fell sorry for her, she never find her Peace looking where she is.
She has allowed me to find my Peace and I have as long as I stay focused. We all have our off days and the the good days arrive again.

[Borealis]

Hope #3 feels better. I think ex gets 2 extra weeks in hell for this one.
Reminds me why divorces are so expensive- because they're worth it!

[Dad1st4boys]

Originally Posted by Borealis

Hope #3 feels better. I think ex gets 2 extra weeks in hell for this one.
Reminds me why divorces are so expensive- because they're worth it!

LOL, yup very expensive..... Mine was $165.00 total. But I only paid #350. for our wedding. Well you get what you paid for...

[comingup4air]

Oh Dad....that is FUNNY!!!

[lyndz7]

I hope your son gets his stomach problems figured out...

As for you ex there are NO WORDS......what a WOF

[nadee_09]

Originally Posted by muskiedad

Dad that selfish decision of hers is a blessing in disguise.

I agree!
Sorry you are going through this Dad. HUGS and hope your boy is feeling much better real soon!

[Bluemoon]

Originally Posted by lyndz7

......what a WOF

Whacked Out Female?
World Of Farts?
Woman Officially F***ed?

[nadee_09]

Originally Posted by lyndz7

what a WOF

WOF

"Wheel of Fortune"???

[Dad1st4boys]

"WOF"? Is that what a female dog says?